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Blaze Confidential: Whose Freaking Quarters Are These?

Whose f'ing quarters are these?

So today wraps up my second week here at 96.3 The Blaze, and it has been quite the whirlwind. I’m settling into my new gig, getting to know people around the office, and learning about this incredible city. Along the way, every single question I’ve conjured up has had an answer that satisfied me.

Except one…

See those quarters? Those quarters have been sitting on our console in the Blaque Owl Tattoo Studios since my first day here. Seventy-five cents. Just hangin’ out. Right in the open.

I’ve worked in a lot of radio stations, across many different formats and with many different personality types. I don’t care where it is, this holds true: if you’re in a building with a vending machine, and there are quarters just strewn about the joint, at some point they get snagged. Someone, somewhere is jonesing for a Diet Coke just enough to take change that clearly doesn’t belong to anyone else.

Not these quarters. They’re still here.

And it’s not like it’s just some random assortment of some dummy’s loose change. There are no pennies or nickels along with them. Nope. Three shiny quarters, enough to have bought me at least ten minutes of prime Street Fighter II time at the arcade when I was a kid. Hell, I could use those now, and for the same reason!

Others clearly see it differently. They’re still sittin’ there to my (obvious) amazement.

I’ve even seen people come in and out of the studio while I’m on the air and play with them, rearranging them like they’re Jenga blocks, moving them around in a three-card-monty-type pattern. Eventually, they’re in a different spot, but they’re still there.

Look, I’m no thief, and I have no respect for thieves, but sometimes I’m not goin’ anywhere for a while, and I start craving some peanuts and chocolate.

But this… this goes beyond simple spare change.

For two weeks, these damned quarters have been within my reach. Where did they come from? Why are they still here? Who would notice if they were gone? Why the f*ck am I blogging about things that I wouldn’t think twice about stashing in the center console of my car for all eternity?

Most importantly, is there a statute of limitations on unclaimed pocket coin? Or is it claimed and I just don’t know by whom?

I’m going to do what any other relatively-neurotic weirdo would do in this situation: I’m ’bout to launch a full-scale investigation into this matter.

It may very well get me fired for being a lunatic.

Wish me luck.

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