Christmas Gift Idea – Fart Filtering Underwear

The British have invented the next great innovation. I assumed that by now everyone would own a flying car, but we do have the next best thing. Fart filtering underwear. Introducing Shreddies, underwear that filters the smell out of your ass gas.

According to myshreddies.com

Shreddies flatulence filtering underwear features a ‘Zorflex’ activated carbon back panel that absorbs all flatulence odours. Due to its highly porous nature, the odour vapours become trapped and neutralised by the cloth, which is then reactivated by simply washing the garment. 'Zorflex’ activated carbon cloth would be used as the flatulence filter since its use in chemical warfare suits is renowned. De Montfort University’s testing reinforced this decision when it was proven to be perfect for the task.

I've been wearing your Shreddies since last Friday. I'm not taking them off! I truly love them. I can pass gas and nobody around me knows it!
This is truly amazing. Now I don't feel bloated any more and my job is easier because I don't have to worry about embarrassing moments because of my bowels.
My life has improved dramatically. I might even consider dating again.
Thank you for changing my life for the better. I'm going to order more!

Norbert Drust, USA