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Grandpa Needs Dong Bags – STD Rate Skyrockets For Seniors

They don’t call them the “golden years” for nothing. Since the invention of drugs like Viagra, elderly people are having greasy monkey sex on a regular basis. Why not? The only problem is, they are catching all the STDs that Grandpa and Grandma contracted during “the war (whichever one that may be)”

According to Ezekiel J Emanuel and the New York Times

Numbers from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention show rapid increases in S.T.D.’s among older people. Between 2007 and 2011, chlamydia infections among Americans 65 and over increased by 31 percent, and syphilis by 52 percent.

First, retirement communities and assisted living facilities are becoming like college campuses. They cram a lot of similarly aged people together, and when they do, things naturally happen.

Second, older people are living longer and are in better health. As a result, they are remaining sexually active much later into life. Several major surveys, including the National Social Life, Health and Aging Project and the National Survey of Sexual Health and Behavior, report that among people age 60 and older, more than half of men and 40 percent of women are sexually active.

Hear comedian Pablo Francisco talk about old people and sex

NSFW

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