Throughout all of history music has been there to tell stories.  It has told takes of war, love and heartbreak.  We aren’t looking at that boring stuff though.  We want to take a look at some of the most bad ass fictional characters in music.

We have spanned genres and time to come up with 10 characters that you may like to hear sung about, but wouldn’t want to be caught alone with in a dark alley.

10. Big Jack

When it comes to AC/DC, they are all about the party.  ‘Big Jack’ is a song about a guy who likes to party hard, and fight even harder.  Basically, you don’t want to mess with Big Jack, but if you’re on his good side, he’ll totally get your back.

9.  Quinn The Eskimo

‘You’ve not seen nothing like the Mighty Quinn.’ Written by Bob Dylan, and made famous by the boys in Manfred Mann,  some say it was based on a nursery rhyme and others an iconic role played by Anthony Quinn. Either way Quinn is one kick butt Eskimo.

8.  Superbeast

Rob Zombie is big into monsters and other scary things, and while we aren’t exactly sure what the ‘Superbeast’ is, we know that it’s something that you don’t want to be on the wrong side of.  if it’s anything like the music video suggests, than it’s a hot motorcycle riding chick who uses swords to kick some ass.

7. Tom Sawyer

It’s Rush’s iconic anthem to Mark Twain’s character of the same name.  Tom Sawyer is basically about a guy who won’t bend to society’s wants and needs and does what he wants.  A nonconformist if you will.  Neil Pert describes him has modern day rebel with a purpose.  Sounds good to us.

6. Johnny

An epic battle between man and the devil in ‘The Devil Went Down to Georgia.’  You can’t help but love once Johnny brings the devil down to his knees.  Hands down the most bad ass song to ever feature a fiddle.

5.  Slim Shady

Marshall Mathers is real and Slim Shady is a persona but we just aren’t sure where one begins and the other ends.  Sure Eminem is a person, but when he is writing his songs it’s a total character, and amplified version of himself.  So basically, we wouldn’t want to be alone with Eminem, Marshall Mathers, Slim Shady, or whatever character he cooks up in his mind.

4. Joe

Hey, Joe. What’s with the gun? Bottom line, don’t cheat with Joe’s wife because he will kill you and her.  One of Jimi Hendrixs‘ best songs.  You think that maybe the guy in the song may talk him out of it, but no, Joe is one determined man.

3. Leroy Brown

A warning tale from Jim Croce.  If you ever happen to be in or around Chicago, watch out for Leroy Brown.  Basically Leroy is a bully, but when it came down to it, a man defending his lady was able to beat ole’ Leroy.  Kuddos for sticking up for your lady mystery jealous guy.

2. Sue

There is only a couple reasons that you would name your son Sue.  You either really want to humiliate him for life, or make him tough.  The Sue we all know from the Johnny Cash song  ‘A Boy Named Sue’ (written by Shel Silverstein — yes, THAT Shel Silverstein) grew up fast and tough.  The guy even fights his dad in the song.  We are happy to report that the two of them are still getting along, despite being named Sue.

1. Iron Man

If you actually listen to the lyrics, this is a very tragic song.  Turns out though, if people had only listened to Iron Man by Black Sabbath, he wouldn’t have destroyed the planet.  Since he basically caused the apocalypse, he is hands down the most bad ass character in all of music.

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