Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
Woman Sentenced to Cook Thanksgiving Dinner for Cops
Who's really being punished here? Valerie Rodgers, or the cops she's cooking for? It depends on good she is in the kitchen, we guess. Rodgers was sentenced to cooking Thanksgiving dinner for three cops and a year of probation for reckless driving that resulted in felony charges.
The Funniest Election Day 2012 Memes
Yesterday was the day for voting for in our Grumpy Cat Look-Alike Poll. Today is the day for voting for actual elected officials. (And in our Grumpy Cat Look-Look-Alike Poll, because it takes like a second. Seriously.) Here are the best memes about voting we could find, and we even tried to keep in nonpartisan, which was pretty hard, because have you noticed how people on the internet have strong
Football Player Gives Up Touchdown for Grieving Teammate
So this video might not make you cry, but the story probably will. Michael Ferns, a senior at St. Clairsville High in Clairsville, OH, gave up a touchdown one yard from the end zone so that his teammate, Logan Thompson, whose father died two days before, could score instead.
10 Crazy Videos of Hurricane Sandy
Truthfully, we missed most of Hurricane Sandy, the storm that rocked most of the East Coast, yesterday. Because we were inside ... away from the windows, with our curtains closed ... like we were supposed to be. These people weren't, however, so now we can see what was going on outside while we were playing board games with our fingers crossed. Here is some crazy video from yesterday's storm.
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Zombie Pranks Fast Food Drive-Thrus
In the spirit of Halloween, here is a video of a man in zombie make-up driving through various fast-food restaurant drive-thrus and demanding chicken nuggets.
‘Charlie Bit My Finger’ Kids Surface in Ragu Commercial
It's been a good year for the 'Charlie Bit My Finger' kids. First they got their own show, and now they've starred in a commercial for Ragu. We were kind of hoping it turned out pasta sauce was why Charlie tried to eat his brother's hand. Turns out, their online success just depresses them both so badly they have to drown their sorrows in spaghetti...
Christopher Walken and Sam Rockwell Reenact ‘Honey Boo Boo’
The cast of 'Seven Psychopaths' sat down to do a little promoting for their work, and ended up being forced to read a transcript of 'Here Comes Honey Boo Boo' on camera for Screen Junkies.
Marching Band Covers Classic Video Game Themes
Anybody who was in high school marching band can go ahead and hang their head in shame now. The Ohio State University marching band just made all those mornings you woke up early to practice 'Taking It to the Streets' totally obsolete.
Insane Clown Posse Suing FBI Because of Course They Are
Seriously, you do not want to mess with these guys, lest you wind up drenched in Faygo or, worse, on the receiving end of a lawsuit. Clown rappers the Insane Clown Posse are suing the FBI for categorizing their fans, the Juggalos, as a dangerous street gang. That's right, the Juggalos are right up there with Latin Kings and the Aryan Brotherhood.
‘Full House’ Cast Reunites — Where Are the Olsen Twins?
The 25th anniversary of 'Full House' has come and gone, and the cast decided to celebrate by reuniting. Meanwhile, the Olsen twins decided to pull a "Dewey" and not show up. We know, big shocker. But everybody else looked very happy and decidedly non-waifish. Take a look!
Zombies Overtake Columbus, Screaming Ensues
This video is basically just a bunch of people reacting predictably to a zombie man chasing them, but there are a few treasure moments in this prank on the people of Columbus; namely a woman who threatens to use self-defense on one zombie, and a guy who's bike will not go no matter how fast he pedals...
Nerd Out With the New Trailer for ‘The Hobbit’
Another trailer for 'The Hobbit' has graciously been released, and it's a full two-and-a-half minutes long. Don't worry, knowing Peter Jackson, there's plenty of movie left unspoiled.