Fairs & Carnivals Bring Out The Freaks
It’s true, fairs & carnivals bring the freaks out and it’s not just the employees. Nuthin’ like a beer garden plus a day under the hot sun plus farm animals plus clowns plus carnies plus barf inducing rides to bring out the crazy in everybody.
Holy crap did I tell you about Little Linda? YIKES dude. Last weekend I found myself at the State Fair in Great Falls. Stupendous fair by the way, huge selection of rides and all of their shows are free. Charlie Daniels was there the night I was…anyway. So they have these booths where you pay 50 cents to see something mind blowing, like a snake girl, who has no arms or legs, just a woman’s head with a snake’s body. Course you go in and it’s a hologram or some hokey crap, right? We did a few of these and got a good chuckle…until we met Little Linda.
The barker at Linda’s booth promised that, for only 50 cents, you could see the world’s smallest woman. Only 29 inches small, an adult woman the size of a small child said the barker. He even said he’d give anyone who could prove Little Linda was not a real person, $10,000. No joke. So of course I had to see what was up. I pay my fiddy cents and I’m all giggles. Until I see Little Linda. Holy Hell SHE’S REAL. AWKWARD! Big time awkward. Face to face with the world’s smallest woman. So I go “oh, hi Little Linda” and book wicked fast. Cripes. Linda has replaced the werewolf in my nightmares.
Then there were those 2 teenaged chicks who attacked a police officer at this year’s fair in Helena in attempt to jack his gun. Who the eff just does that?
I’m telling you, the fair just brings out the crazy in folks.
The Western Montana Fair begins Tuesday, August 9th here in Missoula and runs through Sunday the 14th. No Little Linda or horse racing (don’t get me started on the races) but it’s a Missoula tradition. It’s a proven fact that if you don’t eat a minimum of one Tater Pig & one Viking every 12 months, that you will be left feeling empty, like you’re missing something important. It will plague you.
Strip Club KC and our boy Aaron “The Tallest DJ In America” Traylor will host the Demo Derby again this year. The derby is Sunday the 14th, be listening to win tickets.
Here’s all the info on this year’s fair, see ya there you crazy mofo.